It's a weird thing: the unsettledness of soul. The past three years, I've been in a very comfortable world with a 'perfect job' (one that fit my gifts and passions really well!). Why on earth would I find my soul unsettled? Why would the deepest part of who I am be in perpetual unrest?
Soul-stirring is a means of God-directing.
God has stirred my soul and is sending me wandering. In doing so, He is preparing me for something that lies ahead. He has called me away from the comfort…into confusion…in order to find the rest that He alone can give!
Question: Why would He do such a thing? Answer: To cause me to cling to Him. Reasoning: When I’m comfortable, I don’t need His comforting. When life is in line, I don’t need His tweaking. When everything is in tune, I’m not desperate for His arranging.
The Old Testament people are an example of this: God called them out of the comfort of slavery (though definitely not a 'perfect' condition, it was a stable condition none the less - see Ex. 16:3) and into the confusion of wilderness wandering. He did this to lead them into the Promised Land, and to spend many years shaping and re-shaping their lives. This same God plans to bring me through the wilderness (i.e. the last two years at Calvary, and my current Dallas excursion) to shape me into the man He’s creating me to be.
Who am I becoming?
Not sure. But it will take a wilderness wandering to find that out.
When will I find rest of soul?
I don’t know that either. But I do know that if I stayed where I was (in the comfort of Connecticut) and didn’t step out to journey with the Great Life-Shaper, I would never find the deep rest of soul that He alone can give!
Lord, lead me on the journey. Teach me. Grow me. Change me. For your glory and my joy.
Interesting way to start Bryan...with you asking "what brings me here"?; and me asking "what keeps me here"? Both being one in the same, exciting story. It will be interstng to see how God writes the following chapters of our individual yet shared books of life. You say "He has called me away from the comfort…into confusion…" Remember one of the goals...becoming a man of courage in times of chaos. I will too!
ReplyDeleteBryan, enjoy the journey. "Today I begin a new life. Today I shed my old skin, too long, suffered the bruises of failure and wounds of mediocrity." Og Mandino. "I am nature's greatest miracle. I am on this earth for a purpose and that purpose is to grow into a mountain, not shrink to a grain of sand. I will strain my potential until it cries for mercy. I will pray: Guide me. Help me. Show me the way. Help this humble man. Guide me, God." Og
ReplyDeleteHi brian its angel just commentating on ur blog , I know its been over a year since I seen u. Or spoke to u. I just lost my way , u have something special in u , I hope all goes well with u. Good luck bye..
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